We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize