real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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