I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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