there was a trapeze. enough said
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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