It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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