Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
