whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
