they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
