well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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