Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
