Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
