he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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