he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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