Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
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