just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
