dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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