No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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