Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
