i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
