Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
grandma shit on top of the toilet
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
