It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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