Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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