You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize
