Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
