Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
