whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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