Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
