I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
