If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
