Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
