I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just pee around me
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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