She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
