Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I AM VODKA MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
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