google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
