i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
