she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
handjob tips. give me some.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
