Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
