I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
