Midget sex pt 2 tonight
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
