drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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