just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize