I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
In other news, I just burned my penis
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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