I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
