I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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