Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I have post one night stand depression
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
