no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.