Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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