I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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