last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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