I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize