then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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